Graduation

This past weekend was graduation. After 4 years of studying, many examinations, and hours of patient care in the clinics and hospital carefully watched/guided/nurtured by caring and compassionate physician educators... there is now an MD following my name from here on out.

This was not a single person endeavor. It was something that took the love and support of my dear husband, our dogs, and family and friends. Without these other people and things in our lives, I would not have made it through intact, whole, and stronger/more resilient for this experience. So thank you all for this support and encouragement, because while I enjoyed the vast majority of this experience... there were times that were hard emotionally/mentally/physically, things that I had to miss, and times I just needed to just "feel human" for a couple hours and the coffee nights, saunas, attending church, etc really helped with that. So thank you all!

On that note...

My family arrived Thursday night -- even grandma came with my parents and 2 sisters! It was so fun to visit with everyone in our home, and have company this last weekend that we live in this apartment.

The party Friday night was so fun. Thank you to all that attended this graduation / going away shindig. It was nice to visit with everyone that was there. It was so nice that even some of my out of town family could come -- 2 of Pete's sister's from MN came with 2 of my nieces, and a sister came en route to home from a business trip despite some airport frustrations!

And Saturday... I don't know how quite to describe the feeling of walking into a crowded stadium with the people filled with those that myself and my classmates all love to celebrate the attainment of our new title of Doctor. I thought I had prepared for this experience -- felt that my excitement had peaked around the time my diploma came in the mail with the ceremony was mere formality and something I should attend/do. But, was I ever wrong. I think the ceremony made me realize that 1) finishing medical school was an accomplishment, and 2) I did earn my MD and should not feel bad/ashamed about using it. There was definitely a part that belittled the work that I put into getting this degree, and had a hard time as recognizing myself as one of "the doctor's" -- I think the ceremony served to make me realize that I truly have earned this degree and that have joined the ranks of the others that have earned this title that have gone before me. And even the speeches were meaningful and sweet... not verbose, fluffy addresses without any substance.

And Sunday, Mother's day was relatively quiet. Family left real early, we got a start on the packing/moving that will be going down this week, and were able to meet my in-laws for ice cream, coffee, sauna in the evening.

All in all, a very nice weekend! So happy to be done! :)

Another sacrifice

So, I have not updated in a while... but I feel compelled to do so this afternoon. Med school IS a lot of sacrifice.

Sometimes the sacrifices are easier than others, for example giving up weekends and evening to studying some really interesting things. Spending evenings in the hospital evaluating new patients and trying to understand what's the cause for their current symptoms and complaints.

Sometimes, the sacrifices are not so easy -- such as this weekend; I missed my sister's wedding because of a required school activity yesterday and a combination of other factors (lack of commercial flights that met my schedule requirements, it takes too long to get between here/there to drive, and weather was not cooperating to allow Pete to fly us out there). Even though I knew of this possibility from the beginning when the date was set... I guess I had my heart set on going and just *knew* that somehow I would get out there and be present at the activities of yesterday and today. But, that was not to be and instead, I spent the last 3 days tearful and disappointed. And though this sacrifice may seem trivial or silly to some, to me... there is no place I would rather be this afternoon than being part of the activities surrounding the wedding. Instead, here I sit too many miles away typing, studying, and trying to keep my mind occupied to avoid thinking about what all I am missing. And, I know this probably won't be the last time I feel this way over missing something.

Don't get me wrong... I usually love what it is that I do each day. I am privileged to hear the stories of many, and get to be part of their healing. I am fortunate to be entering a career with multiple avenues so that no matter what I go into -- I can always try something new if I get bored (ex. teach, research, patient care, etc.). And, there will always be something to learn.
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On a side note, I have finished psych and am now in my internal medicine clerkship. I am learning the foundation of medicine right now. It is so fascinating and most everything I learned my first two years gets used daily. It is, however, a lot of work. I spend M-F from 6:30/7:00 AM - 4:30 PM in the hospital each day + 6:30/7:00 AM - noonish 1 weekend day most weekends + one day each week in the hospital until 11:00 PM. I come home exhausted, and puzzled by the patients that I have seen and spend hours looking up causes/differentials/treatments/etc. so that the next day I am a bit smarter and know a bit more about what's going on. On top of this, I study and complete assignments.

My mom and youngest sister are coming out here in a few weeks. I am excited to see them. They have never seen where we currently live (post move from the house), so it will be fun to show them around the area.

"Normal" Weekend

Today (with any luck -- we find out exam scores in 10 days) I finished my first rotation/clerkship in medical school -- 8 weeks devoted to learning about psychiatry, seeing patients (along with physicians and residents), and even occasionally attending the patient therapy sessions to learn about what goes on while patients attend these groups. While I can't say that I am an expert in psychiatry, I can say that my understanding and appreciation of psychiatric conditions and addictions improved greatly during this 8 week clerkship.

That being said... I now have 2 days off before I start my next adventure (internal medicine). It feels great to have a "normal" weekend -- a weekend where I have nothing to study and I get to wear "normal" clothes for a change (and comfy shoes)! I am looking forward to having this time to do "normal" summer things -- like maybe visit a beach and enjoy the outdoors (provided the weather holds out)! :)

Biking around town/catch up

This past weekend, Pete and I had planned for a day trip to Mackinac Island -- however, the forecast did not hold out for this plan. So instead we made a short flight to a local tourist town for a good lunch (chicken dinner), some window shopping, and a 4-5 mile bike ride. It was a good day.

The bikes that we rode are collapsible bikes, borrowed from one of Pete's coworkers. Boy, are they slick! It made the trek into town (2-2.5 miles each way) much easier, especially since Pete's feet hurt if we walk long distances.

Outside of this little jaunt, we have mostly been keeping on keeping on.

School has started again for me -- this keeps me entertained. I spend my days at the hospital -- seeing patients as part of a team and learning the clinical part of medicine. I spend evenings reading/studying, or catching up on the day-to-day household stuff. The transition to the clinical part of medical school has been interesting, exhausting, and integrates all I've learned the first 2 years of medical school. I am really enjoying it! :)

Pete's sister and brother in law stopped by this evening -- we met at the hangar. So fun to catch up, and see family again. Pete was able to give rides to their two oldest who missed their turn at the Flying Finns tourney -- he had a good time doing this, and they seemed to enjoy their ride! :)

Anyway, happy summer!

Weekend update

It looks like I am not going to be able to do this newest photo challenge~ somehow, as boards creep closer (about 2 months from now -- Jun 18th)... my time seems to be less and less in conjunction with studying and required activities. I have been told that this time limitation only gets worse next year -- but, oddly I am looking forward to that. Third year is spent in the hospitals and clinics. It involves some rotations requiring 24 hour call, overnight call, and coming in on the weekends. I am looking forward to applying all that I have learned these last 2 years in the care of patients, and learning more about many areas of medicine... despite having a crazy schedule.

Last night, I shadowed in the Emergency Department. I felt like I was able to help the doctors with a few things (like removing patient bandages, handing equipment, etc. nothing major) and in the process learn something about Emergency Medicine and review stuff I should already know. It was a lot of fun, and reminded me of why I want to be a doctor -- to help people, solve puzzles, and never be bored.

So, here is my weekend: Friday night shadowing. Going to try on short white coats today, so that they can be ordered and ready before I start 3rd year at the end of June. Hopefully, getting the chance to go to church tomorrow (Easter). And interspersed... getting a LOT of studying done. T-9 days and counting until my next big exam where I regurgitate all I know about metabolism, nutrition, hormone disorders, and reproduction.

30 Day Photo Challenge: Day 12

Today's challenge was a close-up. As I stated yesterday, I am fascinated by the human eye. Outside of the many unique colors, use in expressing emotion - conveying amusement, elation, sadness and anger; and usefulness in experience the many visual wonders of our world -- did you know that your eye contains a treasure trove of information about you?

The part of the eye seen by everyone each day can become a repository for substances -- for example, people with high cholesterol can get a white line around the colored part of the eye called arcus lipoides, or sometimes people that have high copper levels in their blood will have a copper ring around this colored part called a Kaiser-Fleischer ring.

Additionally, if someone looks at the back of the eye (part not seen by the casual observer)-- sometimes changes related to higher pressure in the brain/skull can be seen, or changes in the blood vessels related to diabetes, high blood pressure, infections attacking the heart, and other conditions can be seen; often at the same time as changes to similarly sized blood vessels elsewhere in the body (ex. kidney).

Isn't the eye just fascinating?

Pandora... one of the many things I am thankful for

I study to Pandora -- a station I have made up myself (Copperhead Road/Steve Earle; Sometime Around Midnight/Airborne Toxic Event; Amanda/Don Williams). It's kind of a mellow, even-paced mix that works well for studying. I have stations for other things (like clean the house) -- but these get significantly less playing time.

So, I listen to a lot of music I would never have found myself. Most of it I like. One of these new-to-me artists is Ferron (like the songs: Love Loves Me and A Girl on a Road -- after you get past the first 2 paragraphs). Its slightly old school country, kind of cajun, pretty interesting. However, I am always on the look out for new stuff to add to this station.

What's your favorite thing to do to Pandora? What's on your station?

Life is what you make of it...

Occasionally, I need to remind myself of this statement. There are times I don't always appreciate being med school. Like during my 17th hour straight of studying on a Saturday before an exam, or when I get to playing the mind game of "places I would rather be than here on this couch with a book in my lap", or when the tax statement comes showing just how much I will owe for the privilege of attending school.

However, there is a lot of things that I like and reasons why I chose to go. School is interesting -- I get to learn about the magic and mystery of the many organ systems in the human body, the amazing adaptive potential (and how things can go awry). And if I was not interested (and did not find the process somewhat enjoyable)... I would not be able to put in the 17 hour days, or length of schooling.

But, I digress... Today, I just finished the urinary tract domain with a 2.5 hour exam was this morning. It feels good to decompress, and relax a bit after my exam -- taking a nap, watching a movie, having a meal more substantial than Cheerios and milk... I again feel refreshed, renewed, and ready to learn about the next organ system (lung), clean the apartment and fold laundry. Such is the pattern of my life... repeated in 3 week intervals.

Life is what we make of it. For any decision or point in a life, there is always going to be something to complain about or something you don't always care for. Life is what you make of it... choosing what to focus on and the mindset is a big part of dealing with big challenges. I got myself into this "mess", I may as well enjoy the ride and learn something interesting along the way! :) 

PSA: Vaccines are important

School takes up a quite a bit of time, and one of the things that we keep learning about are the importance of vaccines. So, I thought I would share. They help prevent infections, and complications of infections. For example, the chickenpox vaccine is now given in order to help prevent shingles later in life and other complications of chickenpox. The whooping cough vaccine (as part of dTP) is given to adults to prevent whooping cough in infants -- which is potentially fatal or could require prolonged hospitalization.  So vaccines are important (including the old ones)! :) Additionally, as long as people keep getting vaccinated -- hopefully we can prevent some of the "old" diseases from making a come back (ex. polio, measles, etc.). Unfortunately, some of these diseases (ex. measles, polio) may now be on the rise because of decreased immunization rates.

This past week, I was introduced to this song (The vaccine song): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u1xw0Ob5bqs which I found funny/cute. Hope you enjoy!

I am now a Second Year (med student)

Second year starts today... I am looking forward to again being challenged by school (although, I am not so excited for the large exams this year -- including my first board exam in June). It looks to be an interesting.

Our first domain is neuro... 3 weeks, and about 700 pages of coursepack (with some additional chapters of required reading outside that). In addition to that, we will learn and be examined on our ability to perform a complete neuro exam on a patient. We also have unknown amounts of reading in ethics -- but know that in the next 3 weeks we are expected to produce 3 short 1-pg essays, and a paper on an encounter with a patient regarding advanced directives.

This will be my life this year -- new domain about every 3 weeks, plus some additional classes thrown in for good measure. Majority of our learning is supposed to be self-taught (but we will have lectures and small groups thrown in to keep us on track), and we are supposed to do a 1/2 hr study for boards each day. I am looking forward to it, but am also nervous. Should be a fun year!

Done with 1st year!

And the title says it all! :)

I took my last anatomy lab exam this morning (with any luck -- still don't know my final score) because I had missed it earlier in the year from my car accident. I am no longer one-exam-away-from-being-done-with-1st-year. I am now simply done with 1st year.

It feels incredible.

Reminders that I am a nerd

In honor of returning back to school today (to start studying for my last test of 1st year, then a 3 day break before 2nd year starts)... I thought I would post a top 10 list of sorts. All the little things that remind me each day how nerdy I am. And I have come to be okay with my inner nerd, so its all good. These are in no particular order.

10. I now wear glasses, legitimately. I used to buy frames from Claire's in high school and wear them because I wanted glasses. I prefer the type of glasses with visible frames, thankyouverymuch.

9. I own more than my weight in text books, course packs, and school supplies.

8. Last year, I went through over 20 multi-colored permanent markers, 12 colored pencils, ~30 markers, a box of crayons, ~40 pens (multiple colors, mostly gel pens), ~20 highlighters, and ~10 pencils. Reading this, makes it sound kind of like I am in some sort of strange art class.

7. I do not get People or US Weekly. I get JAMA and Reader's Digest (second magazine, admittedly pretty normal).

6. I find it mildly anxiety provoking to be without computer access for a while -- i.e. no internet, email, etc. Strange, right? That's supposed to describe my dear husband! :)

5. I would prefer to read a novel or watch a movie with some fantasy or plausible sci fi element, rather than a pure romance novel or anything else. This means I like books like: Tuck Everlasting, the Harry Potter series, Twilight, etc. or anything by the author, John Darnton. I like them to be an escape from reality.
4. I enjoy a good debate. Debate is not the same as argument. I was on the debate team in college, and found the sport intellectually challenging, and fun.

3. For clothing, I am into what's comfortable. I will take the dog for a walk in yoga pants and a T. I go to school in hoodie and jeans. I wear dress pants and a sweater to church, because its too cold to comfortably wear skirts in the wintertime. I have no idea what's fashionable. I have no clue who the top designers are. I just know that my mood is directly correlated to my comfort, and if I am not comfortable... than I am less agreeable. So, I try to find clothes and shoes that I am comfortable wearing.

2. We own more than 4 working computers, 3 printers, and have boxes of spare computer supplies... for 2 people. Why you ask, because you never know when you might need a new fan, or extra mouse, etc. and 2 of the computers were upgraded for various reasons. (Eta... this was thinned down this past week to: 3 working computers, 1 printer, and 2 boxes of spare computer parts). (3 computers below -- also 3 bookshelves, though these are not by any means all of our books!)

1. Biggest reminder... I am in graduate school, and returned to get additional schooling after an extended break. It took me a while to admit, even to myself, that I really missed school and liked to learn in that environment. But, I do. So here I am.

And, so I am a nerd.

My last summer (off) ... ever

Was a summer well spent?

I think so. However, I did not do anything fantastic or adventurous unlike my classmates; many are in the midst of doing research projects near and afar, attending medical conferences, or doing medical volunteer work abroad with some sightseeing of great places along the way.

Instead, with my 8 weeks of freedom I:
-Spent a week up North
-Spent a weekend on Lake Michigan, fishing, relaxing, and eating ice cream
-Attended the local fair and saw the rodeo/bull riding
-Spent a few weeks cleaning out our house and sorting through our belongings (ongoing)
-Will be spending 2.5 weeks in the anatomy lab starting 8/11/11, studying in order to take my last anatomy exam (with any luck)

Intermixed with these bigger projects and activities, I also saw family and friends.

**Note: I will end up with 3 days of freedom between the completion of my anatomy exam and orientation for school. But, somehow when I was registering my bike (yes, I have another one!), car, and shopping for some school supplies the other day... it was feeling like summer was almost over... feeling like I should be shopping for a few outfits to wear for the school year, thinking about pulling out a long sleeve shirt or two, and being on the look-out for red topped trees in another few weeks.

What does one year of med school curriculum look like?

Getting that I am almost done with the first year and am starting to study for finals/put away books and re-organize the bookshelf... I decided to weigh the material sitting on my bookshelf.

About ~140 lbs.

Note: This is just the text books, coursepacks... and does not count the many volumes of notes that were taken independent of this stack of books, or the stacks of notecards I use to memorize things. Also, does not include the clinical skills supplies or anatomy lab supplies.

I think I must have spring fever. You know that antsy feeling that seems to come when the seasons change and nicer weather appears? It seems to have come a bit late this year, perhaps owing to how busy I was with schoolwork last semester... I stopped noting the passing of days (only time until the next test). But, I do have it now. So, I am trying to find little activities to fill my time. Like going for more walks (Hondo likes that one), or cleaning up the apartment (its much cleaner than it has been at any other time than when we moved in), or re-arranging and thinning things... I guess my cupboards like that one.

In other news or what-have-you...
I have now completed 2 semesters and 1 week of a third semester of medical school. About a year ago, I had received my acceptance and was nervous/anxious/excited to start... worried that my seven year break in formal education would be too long. I will say this, returning to school was an adjustment in and of itself... but I think the life experience between my years of schooling has enriched my education. There have been many things I have learned in med school which I have been able to relate to things that I had seen/learned/experienced between undergrad and starting med school. It really has been fun to go back to school and learn, I am grateful to have had the experience and looking forward to starting next school year.

Between Spring semester and my current semester, I had a week break which I used to go to Minnesota. It was so fun to go home and spend time with family there. I was kept quite busy each day, and it was fun to see everyone there! While I was there I went to a cousin's wedding, services in the cities, out for appetizers; to Menahga to visit my Grandma (and thank you to the aunts, uncles, and cousins who also came and visited with my mom, dad, and me!); and was able to spend time at each of my sister's and sister-in-law's homes, as well as at my mom & dad's. It was nice to be able to go for a week and spend a little time at each place! Thank you very much to all! :) I will have to post pictures once I load them on my computer.

Misc. Ramblings

About a week ago, a few of my friends and I met for coffee at a place near my new home. It felt so wonderful to have this type of companionship for an evening, we talked about lots of things and nothing until much past my bedtime... it was certainly a nice and welcome break from school.

This is the beginning of the most difficult week in Block I (first year of medical school). We have 3 exams in 5 days (1 down, 2 to go), one of those being a final exam in a difficult course. Because of this weeks intensity, we missed an out-of-town family wedding over the weekend. It would have been nice to go, but sometimes its not possible to make it to everything. I am really looking forward to Friday -- the last exam of the week, and beginning of spring break!

In other news, its nice and sunny today. Its about 40 degrees... I am really starting to get spring fever and looking forward to days that I can sit outside and study! :) Spring is on its way!

2.5 weeks until spring break.

I need to keep that number in mind, because the next few weeks are going to be difficult in terms of school work load. During these next few weeks, I have 6 exams, 4 quizzes, 2 patient interviews, and 2 papers (following the 2 patient encounters).

2.5 weeks until spring break.

Intersting things learned so far in med school

Following an exam today (one of many this semester), I need to remind myself of all the cool things that I have learned so far in medical school:

-How to use an otoscope (the thing doctor's look in your eyes with), opthalmoscope (the thing doctor's look in your ear and nose with), stethascope, and blood pressure cuffs... I now even have one of each of these items! :)
-Licorice consumption can lead to low potassium in your blood (hypokalemia) and high blood pressure (hypertension)... this is not talking about twizzlers or cheap licorice candy, but more expensive brands of licorice and items that contain real licorice extract or the compound, glycerrhetinic acid.
-Fat from food flows through your lymph system (and not through your blood).
-Panda's can't taste umami, one of the five basic senses.
-The reason hydration packets contain salt and sugar.
-Mucus contains antibodies, and helps to fight (and prevent) infection.
-Something called an auscultatory gap -- where when you measure blood pressure, there can be a gap in sounds and can lead to an inaccurately low blood pressure reading.
-How a body adapts to different kinds of conditions -- bone becomes stronger or weaker depending on activity (and type of activity) level; your gut adapts to different diets to maximize food absorption; you immune system responds to different types of infections, etc. So interesting, and amazing!

Most days, I do really enjoy being in school again. I feel lucky to be able to learn so many interesting things. Of course, there are days that are stressful, or when I momentarily feel overwhelmed. But, most of the time... I don't realize how much time I actually put in, because it is enjoyable and contains at least one fascinating bit of trivia.

Like, did you know that you secrete growth hormone when you sleep?

School update

Life's mysteries explained.

These last few weeks I have been filled most days to the brim with new information. Most of this information would have been very useful the last few years in my last job. It makes it so much more fascinating to learn about the hows? and whys? of body systems in anatomy, biochem and physiology. I can immediately fill in the blanks of my wikipedia based prior anatomy lessons. Every time I learn one of these things... I think, why didn't somebody just explain it that way before?

I am enjoying school. I am consistently amazed at the amount of time and energy it takes to go to class, do the reading, and keep up in lab. I often am so engrossed in the material that I loose track of time -- and hours pass by very quickly. I often feel that there is not enough time in each day to do everything that I used to do. The things that have been sidelined are: house projects, many cleaning activities, social activities, and laundry (especially folding and putting away clothes). I am lucky to have wonderful classmates that I enjoy learning from and with.

On that note, my scrubs (which I wear to anatomy lab) are finished washing. Now to transfer them to the dryer, so that I have clean scrubs to wear again to anatomy tomorrow.

One Week In... Many to go

I have now completed my first week of medical school.

The material is fascinating. The speed at which it comes is intense.

During orientation it was likened to two analogies, both of which I believe to be true:

Medical school is like, trying to take a drink out of a fire hydrant.

Medical school is like, trying to eat an elephant. You have to eat it one bite at a time.

So far, we have went through about 75-100 pages of course pack material (i.e. lecture notes) in each class. This does not count the many pages of reading required outside of class, just to keep up in class. Additionally, for each of my three main science courses (currently), there have been at least 1 (if not more) additional lecture supplements that need to be watched online.

Med School is not like undergrad. The instructors do not get behind in the course material. If they are not able to cover 1o min. course material in lecture, it becomes an online lecture supplement. It is not covered at the start of the next class period, before moving onto the next planned lesson.

I have my first quiz on Tuesday. Wish me luck! :)